part eight.
My motto in life lately has been tbd. To be determined. I don't even know what life is right now, I'm just going with it. I love how God works and how He is ever growing and changing me. Even if it's out of my comfort zone, which I can tell ya - it is. I've said out loud on multiple occasions lately, Ohhh God, you're so funny, because life has a way of taking you places you never thought you'd go. If you'd have asked me five months ago I'd be where I am now I wouldn't have believed it. And I don't mean that in a bad way. Many of the changes are very, very good. Reflecting on my journey thus far, I am truly amazed and can only dream of what's ahead.
Fast forward to this morning where I was teaching the story of Joseph to a class of Pre-K students for their chapel. This lesson had been previously scheduled and it's a story that has become one of my favorites of not only God's provision, but of Joseph's faithfulness. Joseph, who was sold into slavery at the age of seventeen by his brothers, who was wrongfully imprisoned, who didn't see the outcome of the dream he had as a a boy for over twenty years, remained faithful. It's easy to read a story you've heard your whole life and shrug it off or not really take into account the reality of it. Over twenty years of waiting. And yet we see that throughout all of it, "the Lord was with Joseph". When Joseph stood before his brothers he had the faith to say, "As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good."
That's the kind of faith I want. That's a long time to wait. Joseph could've easily questioned God, lost faith, or gotten revenge on his brothers. But, he didn't. "Joseph looked up at his brothers who hurt him, who were standing with their hands out, and he realized, this is the dream." He had the clarity to see beyond himself. To see the bigger picture of how God was working all things for good.
I listened to a podcast recently on the story of Joseph and this hit me to the core.
"If I put it in His hands, if I have the patience to let it develop, if I have the patience to know that every scene of my life is playing in the bigger picture.. not of the dream that I had but of the desire that was in God’s heart. I might be standing in the middle of a dream that I don’t have the clarity to see right now because the picture does not match my preference. But I’m willing, ready, and able to trust God even in the dark places of my disappointment because I understand that some of God’s greatest work happens in the dark. I trust You, not my dream. I trust You, not my idea. I will not make my ideas my idol. I’m worshipping You."
We all inevitably have dreams and expectations of how we want to see our life played out. I keep coming back to the verse, "to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us." What makes us think we could possibly know better than God? We don't even have the ability to ask or imagine what God can do through and for us. What if we truly gave it up and allowed Him to use us? If we trusted God to complete His work?
"We attach ourselves to a version of a dream that may not have even come from God to begin with. What if the reason God let your dream die was because it wasn’t big enough?"
Think on that. I shake my head at the thought of some of the things I thought I wanted previously. It's kinda funny actually. Even in that you guys, we cannot go backwards. We cannot live in our mistakes or our what if's. Press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. There's freedom in knowing that He can use me right now, right where I'm at, if I am willing. If I trust Him.
"This is the dream. To know Him, to serve Him, to love Him." Nothing else really matters. Nothing I thought I wanted. No thing, no person, no goal will every satisfy me. "But whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." We can spend our lives searching, dreaming, wanting, but He is the only One who will ever truly satisfy.
God, help me to let go of the tight grip of what I thought I wanted. Help me to trust. Give me the faith to know You will complete Your work. Here I am God, use me.
Here's another favorite song I love that lives on repeat. Eva just looked at me and said, "ohhhhh, that is SO pretty mommy!! You play that in the car last night!!!" Ha! See? I told ya.
Fast forward to this morning where I was teaching the story of Joseph to a class of Pre-K students for their chapel. This lesson had been previously scheduled and it's a story that has become one of my favorites of not only God's provision, but of Joseph's faithfulness. Joseph, who was sold into slavery at the age of seventeen by his brothers, who was wrongfully imprisoned, who didn't see the outcome of the dream he had as a a boy for over twenty years, remained faithful. It's easy to read a story you've heard your whole life and shrug it off or not really take into account the reality of it. Over twenty years of waiting. And yet we see that throughout all of it, "the Lord was with Joseph". When Joseph stood before his brothers he had the faith to say, "As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good."
That's the kind of faith I want. That's a long time to wait. Joseph could've easily questioned God, lost faith, or gotten revenge on his brothers. But, he didn't. "Joseph looked up at his brothers who hurt him, who were standing with their hands out, and he realized, this is the dream." He had the clarity to see beyond himself. To see the bigger picture of how God was working all things for good.
I listened to a podcast recently on the story of Joseph and this hit me to the core.
"If I put it in His hands, if I have the patience to let it develop, if I have the patience to know that every scene of my life is playing in the bigger picture.. not of the dream that I had but of the desire that was in God’s heart. I might be standing in the middle of a dream that I don’t have the clarity to see right now because the picture does not match my preference. But I’m willing, ready, and able to trust God even in the dark places of my disappointment because I understand that some of God’s greatest work happens in the dark. I trust You, not my dream. I trust You, not my idea. I will not make my ideas my idol. I’m worshipping You."
We all inevitably have dreams and expectations of how we want to see our life played out. I keep coming back to the verse, "to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us." What makes us think we could possibly know better than God? We don't even have the ability to ask or imagine what God can do through and for us. What if we truly gave it up and allowed Him to use us? If we trusted God to complete His work?
"We attach ourselves to a version of a dream that may not have even come from God to begin with. What if the reason God let your dream die was because it wasn’t big enough?"
Think on that. I shake my head at the thought of some of the things I thought I wanted previously. It's kinda funny actually. Even in that you guys, we cannot go backwards. We cannot live in our mistakes or our what if's. Press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. There's freedom in knowing that He can use me right now, right where I'm at, if I am willing. If I trust Him.
"This is the dream. To know Him, to serve Him, to love Him." Nothing else really matters. Nothing I thought I wanted. No thing, no person, no goal will every satisfy me. "But whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." We can spend our lives searching, dreaming, wanting, but He is the only One who will ever truly satisfy.
God, help me to let go of the tight grip of what I thought I wanted. Help me to trust. Give me the faith to know You will complete Your work. Here I am God, use me.
Here's another favorite song I love that lives on repeat. Eva just looked at me and said, "ohhhhh, that is SO pretty mommy!! You play that in the car last night!!!" Ha! See? I told ya.
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| I posted this on my story earlier this week. When JJ thought he was Peter Pan. Oh the dreams of a child! |
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| I've been reflecting so much on all the memories of our house, as we are getting ready to list in the next couple days. So many memories, yet so many more to come. |
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| I guess I missed National Daughter Day. I think I post photos of us every day. She has been such a joy and a light in all of our lives. This age is magical and I'm so thankful for her innocence and sweetness every day. |
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| Because I love everything about him. Even if he hates my iced chai. |
